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Etiquette and tricky cases

Where to seat divorced parents at a wedding

Seating divorced parents is one of the most delicate problems in a seating plan. There’s no single solution, but there is an approach that usually works: ask first and decide together with the couple.

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Updated on October 29, 2026

Step by step

  1. Ask each of them

    Talk to each parent separately and ask who they feel comfortable with. Asking beforehand avoids surprises on the day.

  2. Decide: together or apart

    If the relationship is cordial, they can share the head table. If there is tension, put them at different tables, both well placed and with the same prominence.

  3. Count the new partners

    Anyone who comes with a partner sits with them. The partner’s seat counts on the list like any other.

  4. Give equal prominence

    Each parent should have a table of similar visibility, near the couple and easy to find.

  5. Record the rule

    In Seatalia, create an “Apart (different tables)” rule marked as mandatory. Auto-seat never puts them at the same table and warns you if anyone moves things.

What about the extended family?

Each parent brings their own side: siblings, aunts and uncles and new partners. Think of them as two groups and seat each group near the corresponding parent.

The same goes for grandparents, who usually want to be near the people they’re closest to.

Frequently asked questions

What if the parents aren’t speaking?

Then separate tables, both prominent. Agree beforehand who accompanies the couple at each moment, such as the entrance and the photographs.

Can they both sit at the head table?

They can, if both agree. If it’s a large table, put them at opposite ends and seat each next to the people they’re closest to.

Try the “apart” rule

Create the plan and use a mandatory rule so that nobody ends up where they shouldn’t.

Try the rule

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